I am an alcoholic.
My association with alcohol
began like an innocent experiment.
Today, social activity to me means alcohol.
My definition of ‘happy life’ is
alcohol at night to make me sleep
and a drink in the morning to wake me up.
Alcohol has given me friends,
My list of friends is never ending.
It increases as I slosh another drink.
I have build connections,
My life is constellation of LED lights
wait a minute, there’s a twist in my ‘spirit-ed’ tale.
Alcohol is my only friend
Like a PR personnel it manages my brain.
Sympathy has fizzed.
Emotions have diluted.
Cynicism has over taken.
And ‘boss’ I am always right.
Screw you all, I am always right.
Dude! Let me confess…
I often find myself disconnected.
Three voices echo within me at a time –
alcoholic voice, my numb me voice and voice of my soul.
My soul acts loner;
My body hates it as if it is an enemy.
My alcohol possessed mind thinks of it as beast.
Yes, my soul has turned beast.
I ain’t anymore me.
I have turned – he, she, they.
I am crowd and alcohol makes me feel I am THE.
Bringing shame upon,
struggle to exist,
aren’t acts of heroism.
For a person like me,
who is known to be sober otherwise.
It’s a fool’s paradise
We drink to drink
And later drink sinks.
The bout continues,
drink-sink, sink-drink, sink-sink.
So you wanna be real cool!
Sink not rise,
rise to drink.
There’s enough to drink around
Drink and suck all illusion, fiction, hypothesis.
Sense the real cool quotient,
Be the real different one.
Be the real cool.
Dude, enough being ridiculed.
© Kumar Gautam